The Madwoman's Journal Logo Copyright © 2000 New Moon

Go to Previous Entry Arrow   Go to Index   Go to Next Entry Arrow


28 July 2001

I certainly left this place in a mess... Why, you ask? Now, that's a long and boring story!

I smudged my house last night bottom to top. Earlier in the evening I was visiting Jo, and I mentioned that things haven't been going well, and that the negativity is creeping up on me, getting louder and stronger. She gifted me with the stuff to smudge the house: abalone shell, sage, sweetgrass. I already had the wing feathers. So, I came home and smudged.

First I opened a window in each room. Then I started in the basement. I lit the sage in the shell and started fanning it into every corner of every room of the house, saying out loud as I went: "This is a good place, a friendly house, full of caring and peace... no bad things here... no mice (I hate having to put down D-Con, but what can I do if the mice won't stay away?)... no bad bugs (Worth a try, right?)... everything works properly and well in this house (I was smudging the furnace.)... people like this house... it's a friendly, peaceful place, full of love and laughter and—" You get the idea. I did the whole place, even the porches and the "garage." Then I went back and lit the sweet grass (Jo was right: you have to keep lighting it.), and went through again, inviting in the positive energy. I gathered up the paraphernalia, thanked the feathers for their help in cleansing my house, and put everything away. Then I closed what windows needed closing.

I had bad dreams about loss and partings. This weather— so fall-like— and the stress... all the bad feelings from all the losses and disappointments of all my many years are being triggered...

But I can smell the sage and the sweetgrass. And I think the house is better for the ceremony. The house feels better. Maybe, in some ways, I do, too. And so I think I will smudge again. Soon.

Right now, all I want to do is cry from frustration and sadness and... I don't feel like this constantly, just from time to time. Today. Yesterday. This place I've been in for so long (and I don't mean this house, but that's part of it)... sometimes the only way out is to haul yourself up by the bootstraps.


Copyright © 2001 New Moon

Line Copyright © 2000 New Moon

Please feel free to comment at:
(The message board is down. I'm shopping for another.)


Go to Previous Entry Arrow   Go to Index   Go to Next Entry Arrow


Go to New Moon Homepage
Please report problems and link errors to: