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18 August 2000

Another bright, white moonlit night and I'm too tired to revel in it. I want to dance in the light, do t'ai chi-- but I'm tired and my heart feels heavy. Perhaps sleep is best...

For these many weeks, I have thought on and off about my journal. Today, a phrase from the Tao de Ching came to mind: "...Do you have the patience to wait till your mud settles and the water is clear?" I think I've been practicing that patience. My days have been full of work and doing, and I've been doing each thing that needs to be done mindfully, patiently, without resenting the things I'm not doing or can't do.

"... The Master doesn't seek fulfillment. Not seeking, not expecting, she is present, and can welcome all things."

I think there are entries to make in my online journal. I think there are things for me to say. But for now, sleep.


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